Top 10 reasons autism is like fame

One of my friends, who is also an autistic mom, says that having an autistic kid in her small town is like having a movie star life. People stare, point, say really terrible things in full view of child and "normal" sibs. . .you know, all the things the elegantly wasted glitterati complain about. . .no privacy. . .intrusion on life, well, you get the point.

Of course, I understand completely. . .so I have found it therapeutic to make fun of all things painful! So, here is the list!

10. All the offensive close ups! I will NEVER be ready for my close up, Mr. Deville!
9. Having to answer the same old "what's it like" questions as in what's it like to have a brain damaged kid? what's it like raising a retarded kid(that was from someone I THOUGHT I knew) What is autism like? Does he count good? Is he good at cards? GROAN!
8. The annoying habit of people speaking very loudly and "properly" to my son. He is autistic, not deaf!
7. The awe inspiring power of revealing your "celebrity status" of being an autistic mom. That is SO chic! Where can I get MY autistic kid?
6. The default assumption that you are the perfect parent, and can help all "normal" parents appreciate their normal kids. And that leads to the constant requests for advice. If it comes close to working for an autistic kid, think what my kid will do with it! Kind of like the whole ecocelebrity thing. . .Johnny Depp RECYCLES, OOOOOOOOOOH we should too!!!!!!
5. Invoking the autistic savant of the day. . . and having your child compared to that person. I heard Moses was autistic. . .does your son have that Moshe like quality for leadership? EEEEEEK!
4. Having to constantly dodge the opportunity to comment like a Rabbi/Maven on all things autistic- Holly Robinson Peete be damned!
3. Having your past scrutinized to discover your sins. . .for the common good of finding the "secret" behind autism. i e. She has a FREAKISH interest in Sociology. . .and since all of the great sociologists from Simmel to Goffman were all on the autism spectrum. . .hmmmmmm
2. The cult like status that goes with the label- and the possible damage done by missteps. . .Holly Robinson Peete!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

And the number 1 reason-

The pain involved when autism shuffles off the public radar and no longer merits research interest! So, I will miss it when it's gone and resent it while it's here!

Sigh