So- the question has been
posed sometimes well meaning, if not all together politically correct, what will I be DOING about Precious and well, G-d?
For those in the loop- you may or may not know that I am Jewish,
ritualist, if not altogether devout. I do keep Kosher, I do keep
Shabbat, I do the rituals. . . however, when you start to try to pin me down in theology. . .well,
hmmmm, it gets weird.
I have given my children the opportunity, at age 13, Bar
Mitzvah age, as dictated, the option of discontinuing their religious observance and explore their dad's religion, well, their dad's former religion, an agnostic Catholic (he is
really an atheist, but fancies himself a religious "thinker")
Little know fact, Jewish children are suppose to make that choice, with the understanding that while they will remain racially Jews, they may decide to opt out of the whole Jewish religion thing. Silly to think that a 13 year old boy would do so. . .but it DOES happen rarely.
When my boys decided to continue, the task then became how to allow them to form their own religious identities? Take them to
Shul? Many
Shuls? Orthodox? Conservative? Reform? The decision I made was to provide them with as much information about the religion, and share my personal beliefs . . .if they asked. I KNOW, revolutionary! What can I say? I have to say, it has worked out WONDERFULLY, they have been able to fashion a unique way of viewing things and I have learned tons about them as people in the process.
BUT- a few recent events have
challenged this way of life I have been so smug about- a dear dear person passed away at a very young age this past year, and she was the mommy of 2 of my children's friends. Now they have had SCORES of conversations about long dead relatives, and the distance between them is always huge- so they began to believe that only certain people actually 'died" old grandmas and grandpas old people, like 40 year
olds died, not "young" mommies and daddies. . .until last year.
Now, Cocoa is ESPECIALLY anxious about death and such, and Muffin, the 14 year old was WAY BUMMED when he found out that Judaism has no concept of a heaven or hell- everything points to this 3rd rock being the end all be all of eternal reward for the Jew
btw, but I digress.
So, for the VERY first time, I envy those religious people that are SO CERTAIN about HOW IT IS that they can try to force/convert others to their way of thinking. At the very least, I could offer some comfort to my kids, and if it turns out I was WRONG, well, we just all go to hell. . .sigh.
Ok, here is the issue, I am wondering how to handle religion and Precious. He has real cognitive issues, and I could teach him to pray the "right" way, teach him all of the rituals and he could spend his life going through the motions, but would he be "Jewish" or would he be acting it out?
He was
brised and so far that is it, so the question becomes, what do you do with an autistic Jewish child? If one more person tells me to "have faith" I will be most uncharitable in my response!
We, as a society, spend
SOOOOOOO much time struggling with the idea of G-d and divinity, and there is a segment of the population that is convinced that their religion is "it" and factions that feel that religion is not of any importance because there is no G-d. . .so this is nothing new, really, I understand that, but when you are struggling to understand life and trying to get your kids some foundation to build their own lives on, this is one big deal!
Why is it "kind of" ok to allow my OTHER children the opportunity, nay the freedom, to choose, but I must, for Precious's OWN GOOD, make this life decision for him? Because he is autistic? He has no more freedom then, less freedom, as much freedom as I am willing to give him. . .hmmm
Ohhhhhhh, time for hot chocolate school's out!
M out
